3 strikes law

So this has been bothering me for a while. There is a new bill on Beacon Hill for "habitual offenders" and which has been called the "Three Strike Law". Legislators are bragging about it being one of the toughest in the country. It would make "violent and habitual offenders" ineligible for Parole. They define the violent crimes as "murder, manslaughter, mayhem, rape, kidnapping, and assault and battery causing serious bodily injury".

On paper, it is a tough on crime, and makes a whole lot of sense. I mean, who wants these guys paroled, right? Why I agree on some, I think they include over 60 crimes. Murder, rape, and kidnapping makes sense to me. What does not make sense is that we will release individuals that have committed violent crimes with no supervision after their sentence. Part of the bill states that there would some mandatory post-release supervision, but they do not indicate who would be responsible for this or how they plan to grandfather (or not) current parolees, probationers, and incarcerated people. This part of the bill has been proposed in the past but has died due to not being able to agree who would be responsible for this post-incarceration supervision. And, please tell me, if they violate mandatory post incarceration supervision, what are the consequences? 


Also, we will overload a very crowded jail system, jails which by the way, the current administration want to close or reduce. The Department of Correction is the biggest part of the state budget and if this law passes, it will only get bigger. Maybe this gets DOC backing, but keep in mind that it costs roughly $45,000 a year to house an inmate. If this inmate has special needs or is acting up and such, it increases the costs. I firmly believe that inmates who will incarcerated for the totality of their sentence may be a little upset and may act out. I think that by making inmates angrier, more frustrated, and upset at the "system", we may have more issues. If you need some examples of what a three strikes law does to the prison population and their behavior, look up California and their experience with the 3 strike law.


I also believe that with recent issues with parole, the board is more aware of these issues. Cineli and Corales were appalling neglect of the board to read about inmates they are granting parole. I also believe that parole does a great service to former inmates: it sets-up a series of conditions of release that are tailored to the parolee and get them the services they may need. This, in turn, increases the chances of effective adaptation to the community and probably address their criminogenic issues. This, in turn, make our communities safer. Probation does similar work and I also applaud them for their work to get probationers ready for reintegration to the community. I also firmly believe this helps diminish recidivism. 


As for financial considerations, let's take an inmate with a 3 year sentence. If he was released on parole with 1 year left on his sentence, it will reduce DOC cost by $45,000. It will cost maybe $10,000 to be on parole for 1 year. In addition, the parolee must pay $80 a month and if he works (usually part of the condition), this parolee will pay taxes to the government. So, conservatively, the parolee may pay $2500 back to the community, have supervision to support proper reintegration to the community. So again I ask, what makes more sense?


Now legislators need to be "tough on crime" and especially in an election year.  There are some individuals who should NEVER be release...but 97% of them are released at some time....Again, I ask you: 3 strikes, or community supervision

Women, my girls, and feminism

I have had some time in the last 2 weeks to read many articles on several "women" issues. It was International Women's Day last Thursday, Newsday had a full issue on Women's Month and summit,  and there has been lots of talk about birth control, abortion, and women in politics.
Now I want to stress a few things. I believe that many issues are "human" issues and not just "women" issues. As I write this, I also want to stress that men should stand with women on most of these issues but not make the decisions for them. I think that women have a voice in men's issues also, but they should not impose their view on men either. I understand that there are biological and societal differences between men and women but respecting each other's point of view is more of the essence then imposing anything on each other.
So I'll get the issues that bother me. First off, I am sick and tired of this birth control issue. It is not a political issue, it is not a religious issue, it is not a medical issue. It is a women's choice issue. Men should stay away from that issue period if they are not willing to let a women choose. A woman who is against birth control and abortion should just not choose to use them. If a woman wants both, that is fine too. If a woman supports one but not the other, again, not an issue. Let a woman decide for herself.
Women and men should not impose their views on others. Western countries are mostly based on freedom of choice and expression. So let women decide for themselves. I'll be accussed of simplifying a huge issue but whatever. I stand behind my opinion. Are there exceptions? Of course. But how would men feel if women decided on who can or cannot get a vasectomy, procure condoms, or even choose for them if they can or cannot father a child?
Secondly, women are not second rate citizens. This is mostly directed to countries and areas where women are mistreated, mutilated, verbally, physically, or sexually abused. But don't think for a second this does not happen here. It is appalling to see how some people treat women as second class citizens, even in "developed" countries. Very sad too.
I had a great role model growing up: my mom. She worked in HR at a telecommunications company for several years. She was also considered a "superior" most of my life at that job. She broke the glass ceiling before there was one and she never looked back. She was a strong woman, who balanced her home life with her professional life. She spent lots of time with me and also did her job professionally and efficiently. She gave everyone the time of day but made difficult decisions when she had too. She even fired my dad, who worked at the same company (they met there)! I never had to think twice about "women in power" and issues with that. In my book, women and men had equal opportunities to get any type of jobs. I thank my mom for this attitude to this day.
Of course, by the time I entered the workforce, I realized perception of men versus women. I am still aware of it to this day...and it saddens me, angers me, scares me. I have two girls who will grow up in this world. I look at the women I consider friends or that I admire and I hear/see/observe all the difficulties they face. I even look at some of my male friends and their misperceptions or even the language they use about women. I also look at how we continue to socialize girls and it scares me. My girls are allowed to like anything they want, dress with any clothes they want, including boys clothes, and express any emotion they want. My girls play rough but love pink and barbies. They don't want "pink" sports uniforms but what the players actually wear. I refuse to box them on gender...but there is a whole lot of people who try to do it. I don't try to stop it, unless it is excessive, but I let them decide what they want. I want to empower my girls, want them to feel they can be what they want to me...but I sometimes worry that this "civilized" society (US, Canada) won't let them.

My experience with getting an outpatient procedure

So it's been about 48 hours since I went for my outpatient procedure. I don't know what the procedure itself thaught me but I know why I did it and the motivation behind. I was also surprised by the support I got from other men.
First off, it went OK...I got there after taking a prescribed benzodiazepine...which did not affect me until I got there....took away the edge for sure. I was calm  and probably helped with the waiting room wait and the prep time. The left side went pretty quick with limited pain, however there were complications on the right side...I was calm about it until he went: "It's being difficult". Then he said to the nurse to go get a colleague doctor. I detected (or imagined, whatever) in his voice some concern.
I played it cool but I got to admit that it freaked me out. It was OK at first...Until the anesthesia started to wear off...I started feeling more than I realized it was the anesthesia running out...I had to remind them that they may need to give me more anesthesia....they said they would but delayed it ever so slightly...I beg them at some point and they finally did....but they still struggled to find the thing they had to cut, making sure it got in to the clamp...it was probably a few minutes but it felt like an hour. But the anesthesia ran out again...so they doubled up on it...After they did the cut, the nurse and the doctors told me I was pretty strong not to flinch. I have to admit a few expletives went flying though.
Anyway, after they were done, I had to stay there for a few minutes before putting on the jockstrap and the gauze. I walked out a little dazed, with a "goody bag". As I was leaving, I was calling my wife and the doctor ran out to ask me what pharmacy I used, as he was going to call in an antibiotic due to the complications on the right. It was 90 minutes after I went in. A 30 minute procedure? Yeah right! At least my anxiety wasn't playing tricks: it did take longer.
I got to the car walking funny. My two girls tried to talk to me but frankly, I could not really answer: all I wanted was my pain meds. I don't remember what I said to them or my wife other than needing to pick up an antibiotic. And for the record: why would you put speed bumps in a urologist's parking lot? That is just plain cruel! And no, this ain't a joke.
I got home, made a B-line for the meds, two bags of peas, and went straight to my bed. I went through 4 bags of peas off and on since then. It does help with the swelling although trying to hide the process from 2 curious daughters has been difficult. It's been great, as it took away my back pain, as I have no clue about my back right now. I have struggled to stay inactive and now 48+ hours later, I need to get out of the house. The pain is not as bad but it comes and goes.
Now here are a few observations that I have to make: when they were "struggling" with the right side and I had pain, they told me to go to my happy place. I did that for a short while but then used a different imagery: watching my first born playing turtle while my wife was trying to push her out at her birth. If she can put up with that "pressure", a little pain is nothing.
Secondly, a bunch of very manly guys talked to me about their experience with their procedure. It was nice to get some advice but to also know that some men are willing to go through with the procedure. Some other guys beg me not to do it and if I did, I was less of a man and that I better not tell their wives about it. I think some might have been joking but some of it was not a joke and the guys were pretty damn serious about their criticism. I just think it is sad.
I went through it for the simple fact that women go through a bodily change for 22+ months when they decide to have a baby and breastfeed. We have had 2 kids so it's almost a 44 month sacrifice. My little pain for the next few days is nothing compared to that. I am not saying that I am enjoying this but frankly, if there is something that is fair, it is me doing this for my relationship. I respect men who don't want to do it  or have other emotions preventing them from doing this procedure. I know I did what was right for me and my relationship with my wife.
And if I want kids later? There are several options: adoption is a great option. There is also the use of A.I. I have friends who struggle so much to have kids and have used all these techniques and then some. I am so lucky to have two very healthy girls and I feel lucky that we were able to conceive these two wonderful daughters. I look at my friends who have used the other techniques and they seem to be as happy with their kids as we are. So yeah, adoption, A.I., or any other techniques would be OK in my book. But right now, I am pretty convinced that I am done having kids.